you know i think i knowsomething about that deep-downthing of which you’ve never spokenin daylight under cigarette haze if this makes you uncomfortablethen i won’t say it out loudafter this many bad shapesi’m questioning my fitsettling and ambitionlet’s take itand fake what we can getit’s all the same, no? so then why the despairgod isContinue reading “one voice that whispers to itself”
Tag Archives: poem
i mailed my old copy of infinite jest to italy because i couldn’t stand to look at it anymore
if you love something,never get paid for it. i’m a postage amateurfinally best to my bestswelling this blue boxand this oneheavy as my lungs he’s been out a long timeunseen as ever& spotted in an unclear skyshaking leaf to rootviolent splendor/violent love i can’t change my bonesor dodge this perfumefresh money, babysmells good enough toContinue reading “i mailed my old copy of infinite jest to italy because i couldn’t stand to look at it anymore”
windower
there’s so much blood herewe’ll never get the stain outempty for your uncarved imagestraightening undertwin waterfalls i’m on a road paved with dead shoes& glittering insect shellscan’t feel painwithout a body to burnand the sheets never held so much heatyou can’t fake this shit, not now over black coffee, over noise rocktake the map butContinue reading “windower”
it isn’t how it sounds
i am weary of this dance with my thoughtsprotecting them from intrudersa red-winged blackbird screamingfrom her nest& begging disinterest to lift& fade like a fog i am free butthe words on my pageare belongingsdemanded and covetedagainst my desiresand of my desires & desires against desires i am weary of taking messagesamanuensis to your musehello theContinue reading “it isn’t how it sounds”
i’d leave if the rotation was just a little longer
yeah okif yall are gonna beon yr phones theni dont feel so badabout my drunk scribblesfuck it all my boys unhappy& my reluctant crush hasv o m i t b r e a t hits 1117 & im drunk &i wanna be trashed& im so tired of thisDISappearing actjesus why is everything chaosim ready toContinue reading “i’d leave if the rotation was just a little longer”
you’re a ben kweller blizzard
it’s been lonelier than usual at worki keep calling long distancelike it’ll make a differencethis time hi hello again am ibothering youyour tone changedsomewhere recently maybe you’re the wrong bankfor this deposit this is all so counterproductivelike a nailbiting habitborn from hygiene anxiety backskip & blot lipstickmaybe this part won’talways feel so fraught hi helloContinue reading “you’re a ben kweller blizzard”
loosey-goosey
i meant to tell you a story onceit may be stale nowbut it’s three peoplein a smoky apartmentrunning lines, changing wordsembellishing & polishingthe confidence in camaraderieday after day i felt stronger &more alive & ready to stretch. goddamn it was beautiful. uskids cooking a meal together you did thisit’s our story nowall of itand iContinue reading “loosey-goosey”
[ ]
i wrote some notesbeforei opened the floorfor questions& here we are nowi’ll remind youthat you asked. i’m burned out on sexy people& sexy partieshow does it feelbeing yousee i guess you’ve gatheredi’m intense —that’s why i like camping yeah no yeah howdo you get it all quiethow do you convince yourselfto breathe?like this:[ ] butContinue reading “[ ]”
i have to keep fighting muscle memory
it shouldn’t be this easy to humiliate myselfsurely you’ve noticedby nowi’m all shaky handswhen you say hello
bite me you fucking lush
two left out on the edge of nothingand here i was trying to be goodif it ain’t wrong then it don’t feel rightand i’ve cut it off before. yeah i broke it off before.i need designer vacations and drugs with a kickyou can’t kiss me on these filthy sheetsi want to get away. i wantContinue reading “bite me you fucking lush”
mattress dungeon 